October 20, 2018

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.

I’m not exactly sure where this phrase came from but I always remember my Mom saying this growing up and am finding it ever more relevant as I age and parent my own little goslings.
We cannot hold our children to higher standards than we hold ourselves.
If we suck on candy throughout the day – no matter how many books we read about nutrition, conversations about healthy foods we have, or what food we put in front of them…they will likely reach for one more piece of candy to suck on. To fill them up.
If we tell them they should get outside and exercise. Run free. Get energized. Bike. Hike. Swim. Move. But don’t take the time out of our busy schedules to make our physical bodies a priority…..neither will they.
If we limit tv time. Screen time. Counting down minutes, seconds, and shows but use television as our own primary source of entertainment, they will want to couch potato themselves for one more episode…one more movie.
If we emphasize self-love. Self-worth. Self-esteem. The importance and beauty in everyone but constantly berate ourselves; are overly critical; call ourselves names, we are teaching them they aren’t enough.
If we remind them to be grateful for the things they have but constantly are looking to buy the newer, better, more expensive version of what we have, we are teaching them what they have isn’t enough.
If we tell them it’s not okay to yell and shout and scream and tantrum and whine but engage in verbal arguments and aggression in front of them…. They are learning it’s okay to speak to others with that kind of attitude, tone of voice, and hurt.
If we insist our children notice when they hurt someone and apologize but don’t ever actually, ourselves, say the words “I’m sorry” or notice how our actions affect the people around us we are teaching them how to be apathetic.
Our actions speak far louder than our words. Our children are reflections of the places within us that need to stretch and grow. When we begin to recognize the mirroring that is happening we are empowered to change the energy that surrounds it.
If you want them to focus on healthy food choices; choose healthy food.
If you want them to enjoy exercise; find ways to be fit.
If you want them to engage in the non-screen world; explore together.
If you want them to grow up loving themselves; speak love to yourself.
If you want them to be grateful; share gratitude.
If you want them to be empathetic, to be kind; show kindness.
More than what we say, what we do shows our children who we really are.
Does that person align with the vision you have for yourself?
Reflection: Be the vision you want for your children. More than what you say or tell them … They are watching, listening. What you DO means more than what you say. “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”

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